Chutes and Ladders

     Some days I feel like a good mom, and some days I feel like a failure. Some nights I am engaged and patient, while other nights I am tired and snappy. Some days I vary between the two kinds, sort of like "Chutes and Ladders." The very moment you think you are getting ahead of the game....you hit a wall and slide down, right back to where you started from. Tonight was one of those nights. All day I could feel a cold bug trying to move on in, and I knew that the headache I felt coming on, would only get worse if I started yelling. There I resolved to enjoy my children, knowing that the best defense is a good offense.
      We played Qwitch, a weird math game sort of like Uno, then I promised "Chutes and Ladders" right before bed. I fed my children and cleaned my kitchen. I was getting tired so I hid away for 30 minutes and read my book. I knew time was short, it was 7:30 when we set up Chutes and Ladders. The game was fun, but not everybody can win, not everybody can spin at the same time and not everybody knows how to leave the game board alone when it's not their turn. There were two time outs taken by one child, and a crying fit by another. There was only one very patient 4 yr old who, at the back of the pack for the entire game had not offered a single complaint, and then he, of all the children, landed on the BIG downward slide right as he was catching up to everyone else. Poor kid just sat there and muttered, "I'll never win now." So, I just did what any caring mother would do, I let him cheat and back up that slide he climbed, just so I could see his smile return.
    Then I made the mistake of walking away for a minute. When I returned, one child was yelling, one was crying and I was done. The game was done, we were playing for 2nd place anyhow and I asked everyone to head to bed and I picked up the game. 10 minutes later nobody was in bed and that's when it happend. The scary mad mom voice, that even suprises yourself, came out..."GET INTO BED NOW!!!!!" No fun bedtime conversations, no silly games, just a quick kiss, hug and out the door. "Love you, GOOD NIGHT!!!"
     So close to the end, I almost made it...but down the slide I went. Oh well, thank God for forgiveness and new days. I think tomorrow we'll play Candyland.